Saturday, April 15, 2006

A Little of the Old In and Out



In: Anne Sweeney. We'll frankly admit we entirely overlooked the impact of Anne Sweeney's pimp move to stream free ABC shows at the NCTA (In retrospect, forcusing, instead, on MLB and music downloads on the day of the announcemen t was not .. The Corsair's finest moment). Frankly, we thought it was a bad move. From David Eckoff (link via paidcontent):

"In today's media news: ABC television network will offer some of its most popular shows, such as 'Desperate Housewives' and 'Lost,' for free on the Internet in a two-month trial.

"ABC already sells digital downloads of its highest-rated TV shows on Apple's iTunes and this is an opportunity for ABC to learn about the free-to-consumer paid advertising model.

"From a macro perspective, this is interesting in terms of potential to create a viable 'cable bypass', as CBS CEO Leslie Moonves calls it, by going through the Internet rather than over cable or satellite services.

"From a paid content perspective, I'm asked all the time: should media companies offer their programs online to viewers free of charge, monetized through advertising embedded in the streams? Or should companies charge the consumer on a pay per view or subscription basis?

"My answer: It depends on the type of programming - and the strength of the advertising market.

"... One thing I don't hear a lot of people talking about: to what extent is free video enabled by an up advertising market?

"Advertising has cyclical ups and downs. Today, video inventory is in relatively short supply for advertisers. When the advertising market drops again - will media companies find they set themselves up for excess inventory, bandwidth costs- and an audience re-conditioned to everything being free?

"The rush to offer programming free to consumers monetized by advertising reminds me a little of 1999. Remember when the online ad market tanked in 2000?"

These questions still stand unanswered, but Anne Sweeney made the (media) story of the week by being the most aggressive move in this uncharted digital world and forcing everyone else in the space to address whether or not it will be viable.

(David Eckoff)
(Staci at Paidcontent)



(image via buddycom)

Out:Dennis Rodman. Skanky ex-Basketball star and -- it is so weird to say this -- New York Times Bestselling author, Dennis Rodman is ... not ghetto at all. (Averted Gaze) Okay, that was drenched in sarcasm. Let's try that again. From Contactmusic:

"Basketball ace DENNIS RODMAN disgusted Cosmopolitan magazine bosses by demanding money for a cancer charity photo shoot. The sportsman was asked to do a saucy centrefold shot in aid of Everyman campaign, which raises money for research into testicular and prostate cancer, but wanted $13,500 ... for his time. A Cosmopolitan insider says, 'We approached him about posing for us as part of the Everyman campaign and he said he would be happy to do so. 'But there was a snag - he was demanding GBP8,000 for his trouble. So he was told in no uncertain terms he would not be required. 'Some celebrities just don't understand the meaning of charity.'"

Oh, well, what he lacks in class he makes up for in "STDs" (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment)



Weighing an even 112 lbs, from "Parts Unkown," Frank -- Don't Call Me Francis -- Fukuyama! (image via smh)

In: Fukuyama Versus Krautahammer. Do the Letters Pages in Commentary and Foreign Affairs get your panties all up-in-a-bunch? Do you celebrate the anniversary of The Peace of Westphalia? Is the publication of John Lewis Gaddis' "Cold War" news to be received with grateful tears of mirth?

Most importantly: Do you, dear Reader, coil your fists into meaty balls of impotent rage as punk-ass Wolf Blitzer tosses endless softballs at Henry "The Croaking War Criminal" Kissinger wafflish responses on CNN's Late Edition?

You do, right?

If any of these things are so -- play along with us, here -- then the latest news of the bareknuckled intellectual brawl between Charles "The Hammer" Krauthammer (boo!), and Francis "End Of History" Fukuyama (Yaay!), spilling out of the halls of The Council on Foreign Relations (Yes, That's Walter Russell Meade offering to hold Fukuyama's jacket like a bitch), and onto the only marginally less obscure "Letters" page of the New York Times Book Review tomorrow is hott. Icy Hott. Oh, it's on, people; it's on like Gray Poupon, its so on!

"To the Editor:

"Paul Berman's review of Francis Fukuyama's 'America at the Crossroads' (March 26) begins with the following assertion: 'In February 2004, Francis Fukuyama attended a neoconservative think-tank dinner in Washington and listened aghast as the featured speaker, the columnist Charles Krauthammer, attributed 'a virtually unqualified success' to America's efforts in Iraq."

"This is false.

Bitchslap! Krauthammer concludes later, after one hell of a caustic letter:

"I made the point of repeating the problematic nature of the enterprise: 'The undertaking is enormous, ambitious and arrogant. It may yet fail.'

"To call this attributing "a virtually unqualified success" to America's efforts in Iraq is breathtaking mendacity.

"After the war, Fukuyama claimed that he had secretly opposed the Iraq war before it was launched: 'In an interview last week, Mr. Fukuyama said that he had harbored private doubts about the war at the time, although he kept quiet about them then. 'I figured it was going to happen anyway, and there wasn't anything I could do about it' '(The New York Times, Aug. 22, 2004). An unusual reticence, notes one reviewer, for such an inveterate pamphleteer, letter writer and essayist. After public opinion turned against the war, Fukuyama then courageously came out against it. He has every right to change his views at his convenience. But he should be careful when, for the further convenience of giving expediency a sheen of integrity, he misrepresents the views of others."

Simultaneous Translator: Fuck you very much, Francis.

Look for Fukuyama's Payback-is-a-Bitch Revenge in the form of a lumberjack "Whose Your Daddy Match" at the Dallas' Reunion arena with Tommy "Wildfire" Rich serving as special referee and Robert Kagan. (NYTimesBooks)



(image via bmg)

Out: Pink. Once again, P!Nk is rambling against "It" Girls in lusty yet dulcet tones. But -- and we ask this in all seriousness -- what was P!NK a New York minute ago if not decidedly.. "It"? (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment) Were not her hips a swaying and sachaying as "I'm Going Out" was playing on the Club sound System?

Granted, it's not "Punk" to aspire to be a hip-swiveling sex object. (Averted Gaze) Punks revel in being "transgressive." Dissonant. But there is a thin line, dear readers, between the transgressive and The Obnoxious, and P!Nk, we fear, has crossed over into the Dark Side of things. Shall we intervene with extreme prejudice, aujourd'hui? According to Ohnotheydidnt:

"Punk star P!NK has taken herself out of the running to play
JANIS JOPLIN in a new film, accusing the film-makers of turning the
casting process into a circus. Hollywood stars including BRITNEY SPEARS,
LINDSAY LOHAN and SCARLETT JOHANSSON are all battling it out for the
coveted lead role in THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO JANIS. Director PENELOPE
SPHEERIS
has already said P!nk would be her first choice for the part, but
the GET THE PARTY STARTED singer has decided not to pursue the project.
P!nk explains, 'I dropped out of it. Scheduling conflicts. 'Plus
they're trying to turn it into some circus pop contest - who's the 'it' girl
who wants to play Janis. 'Janis was so much deeper than that,'"

She was, indeed, but we just cannot resist, try as we might, the all-encompassing urge to say to P!NK, "SHUT the fUCK up! Yo" There.

All better.

And if P!Nk is truly punk, she'll appreciate our calling her out.




(image via gamebooks)

In: Clever Interactive Advertising Tie-Ins. As Thomas Wolfe -- is he still remembered in these United States of Amnesia -- noted at the outset of the 20th Century, you can't go home again. After those damned pesky -- and addictive -- "Chose Your Own Adventures (And, arguably MadLibs and, in NYC, "Pix TV" on WPIX, channel 11)," and the impact they collectively had on X Gen, there was no way to deny interactivity. We were not going to become passive viewers.We were not going to wear black socks with Bermuda shorts and vote for Eisnehower. (Averted Gaze) Now, in the fullness of Time, advertising is celeverly adpating to the shortening attention span and the plethora of mobile devices, TiVos, etc that compete for the mindshare of the X and Y Generation. Says our old boss Jason Calacanis:

"I was at the gym the other night listening to Adam Curry's Daily Source Code. He was describing a new marketing program called the "Golden Ticket" at his new podcasting company, Podshow. It's--in a word--BRILLIANT!

"The way Podshow's Golden Ticket contest works is that they put a secret message into one out of 25,000 MP3 files downloaded by users. If your file has the 'ticket' then you'll get a message at some point during the recording telling you--and you alone--that you've won. The result? You can be sure that (more) folks are gonna listen to the show."

And on Popwatch:

"Some stories are just too massive -- or too messy -- to be confined to one medium.

"As TV caters more and more to the wonks who sit around wondering how many Hurleys can dance on the head of a pin, games -- for consoles and the Internet -- are picking up the slack.

"The producers of Lost, for example, are, according to Web chatter, reportedly planning to launch a sprawling mythological scavenger hunt called The Lost Experience live on the Internet this summer. It sounds like the famous Jeanine Salla alternate-reality game from A.I.

"TV viewers of old were perhaps too passive for this sort of deep-dig approach to a fictional subject. But as viewership becomes dominated by gamers and geeks, the appetite for myth-sprawl and narrative cryptography grows daily. Thus, it was only a matter of time before an alternate-reality game arose. (Producer J.J. Abrams has been here before: The Rambaldi games online were an Alias fan's dream, or so I'm told.)

"But here's the marketing genius behind this game: The producers' podcast says there'll be clues IN THE COMMERCIALS. When? Sometime during May sweeps."

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