Monday, September 19, 2005

A Little of the Old In and Out

park740e

(image via thecityreview)

In: 740 Park. Our journo homeslice Michael Gross gives us a heaping plate of the smouldering dish in his long-awited "740 Park." Here, according to Rush and Molloy:

"You can tell how exclusive a building is by the would-be residents its co-op board turns down.

"So consider this partial list of rejectees: Elizabeth Taylor, Joan Crawford, Barbra Streisand, Neil Sedaka, Daimler-Benz heir Mick Flick, superagent Ted Ashley, Cendant head Henry Silverman, Triarc chief Nelson Peltz and Seagram heiress Minda Bronfman de Gunzburg."

Well, Neil Sedaka we can understand. He thoroughly ruined our 1975 (We were 4 years old, but a wise and knowing 4) by writing The Captain and Tennile's upbeat horseshit of a pop-song "Love Will Keep Us Together" (Averted Gaze). But, what gives with denying Joan Crawford a place to store her wire hangers, huh? What's up with that?

socrates

(image via archaeonia)

Out: Religio-Philosophico Tees. Fashion is pretty, surface-ish, shallow and, at its best, it serves no visible social purpose other than rendering the wearer positively "fucky." That's the fun of it all, quite frankly. We are vehemently against the jejune concept of "Fashion Museums," or any other such sort of academic investment engaged in puffing up the genre up into anything more than it really is, which is -- brief and beautiful, like the butterfly.

Unfortunately, there is a dangerous movement afoot that says otherwise. First, Patricia Field decided -- unwisely -- that fashion should branch out into the field of ... speculative philosophy (Averted Gaze). Of her "Socra-tees," we wrote, acidly:

"While Patricia Field is a hugely influential clothier, her understanding of classical scholarship and the sacrificial nature of the Death ofSocrates (so that Philosophy --in particular, Political Philosophy -- might live) is ... dubious at best; spurious at least. At best! According to the September/October Yellow Rat Bastard Magazine (I know, I know): 'I've got a scoop for you,' (Patricia Field) says. 'I'm making a new T-shirt with a picture of Michael Jackson after his trial on the front and an image of Socrates on the back. Below Michael's image it will say 2005 AD, and underneath Socrates' picture it will say 399 BC.'"

And now, from Fashionweekdaily, we hear (Excuse us while we avert our Gaze), "as John Bartlett made his runway bow, he wore a t-shirt that bore the numbers '563-483' that stood for the years of Buddha�s life."

Charmed, we're sure.

emmys-moonves-chen9

(image via defamer)

In: Defamer's Emmy Analysis. While The Emmy's were defintiely "Out," (For how does one reward an institution which hoists the Herman Munsterish Brad Garrett over Jeremy "Bell-Piv-Devoe" Piven's Emmy-worthy Ari Gold?) we applaud Defamer's sly reading of the extremely odd CBS camera reaction shot of Les Moonves to the quite out-of-place Dan Rather-Tom Brokaw impromptu J-school lecture on the Evening News (It reminded us, vaguely, of Warren Beatty fake-Hollywood-cheering of Elia Kazan collecting his Lifetime Achievement Oscars a while back):

"CBS overlord Les Moonves applauds after listening to Tom Brokaw and Dan Rather�s moving tribute to fallen colleague Peter Jennings, then wonders if he can get away with permanently replacing Rather on the nightly news with his talentless wife, Big Brother 6 host Julie Chen."

derek_01_800x600

(image via zoolander.com)

Out: Greg Moore. Allegedly casting agent Greg Moore grabbed the "Lower South Side" of a "Lower East Side" male model. According to those intrepid Page Sixxies: "A CASTING agent for Fashion Week runway shows is being accused of groping the crotches of two male models and then turning them down for the b michael spring collection after they refused to 'drop their pants' for him.

"Greg Moore was hired freelance by b michael to cast Monday's show.

"The models, Bernabe Rivera and Mark Cruz, say they are planning to sue Moore for sexual harassment and sexual discrimination. And Cruz says he has telephone messages from the fashion agent 'coming on to him.'

"...'He actually grabbed me,' says Rivera, 23. "He kept telling me to show him the goods. He said if I wanted a career, I'd have to do stuff for him. He grabbed my privates. He said he wanted to see if it was big enough to be in the show.

"'I wanted to hit him, but I went to jail for that once,' says the Lower East Sider, who claims to have posed in magazine and MTV ads. 'He felt the vibe and told me to leave, but then gave me $20 and asked me to cool off and reconsider in a few hours.'" More here.

016_ariannahuffington_nochedeninosbenefit

(image via zap2it.com)

In: PunchLines and Politics. Neil Ungerleider at the 92st Y emailed me of this event, which sounds like amazing. According to the 92Y Blog: "(On) Tuesday, September 20, the worlds of punditry and comedy will converge and collide in Kaufmann Concert Hall in what promises to be a lively dialogue. Punch Lines and Politics: A Seconding the First Forum features Arianna Huffington of the Huffington Post; Paul Provenza and Bob Saget of The Aristocrats; South Park co-creator Matt Stone; Harry Shearer of The Simpsons and This is Spinal Tap; actor/writer/director David Steinberg; MPAA CEO Dan Glickman; and Joe Scarborough of MSNBC�s Scarborough Country. The McLaughlin Group�s Lawrence O�Donnell will preside over the whole affair.

"Between them, they�ll be discussing the limits of free speech, government and non-government censorship, movie ratings, the state of the First Amendment and everything in between. More importantly, what�s the next time you�ll get to see a three-way argument between Bob Saget, Arianna Huffington and Joe Scarborough?"

Holy cats! We'll go, for the record, with Arianna Huffington, but Bob Saget -- known far-and-wide as the filthiest fucking comedian in the Western world -- is a close second. Tickets here; from Neal: "We�re also offering 20$ discount tickets with promo code 'COA,' cus this is just way too good to miss." Agreed. Be there.

Out: Complaining about TheCobrasnake. We love us TheCobrasnake. They afford us a cheap -- well, free -- punching bag. Cracking on the hipsters at TheCobrasnake is like Gestault Therapy. So imaging our surprise when in the "Hot Email Action" segment, someone teed-off on theCobrasnakes:

"I don't understand the Adventure Team portion of your website. The whole idea in general is pretty fucked up (and I think you admit to that in your weak albeit sincere disclaimer) but what I think is REALLY fucked up is the totally racist criteria of the pictures you have up.

"Drunk guy with barf on his face---Ok.

"Fat ass guy in overalls---Ok.

"Guy passed out on train---fine, its pretty funny.

"But what the fuck is so goddamned pathetic about a person working at McDonald's?!"

Hey, we get it totally, Captain Buzz-kill. It's, uh, like, "popstmodernist cultural anthropological commentary" -- wink, wink -- like, ehr, right? More here.

CIMG0123

DPC, Denise and Larry Wohl, downtown during Fashion Week. (image via nysocialdiary)

In: "Downtown." Our favorite social chronicler, David Patrick Columbia, has the final word on Fashion Week, in NYSocialDiary, observing:

"We left to go next door, invited by Larry and Denise Wohl who were going to designer Zac Posen�s party at Home, another club in what looks like another former warehouse ... Open bar again, four and five feet deep with revelers.

" ... One thing that is classic Fashion in New York now, as it has been for sometime, is Downtown. Be it SoHo, Tribeca, Chelsea, Nolita, East Village, the Meatpacking District, Downtown in New York is where fashion is, what fashionable is. For those of us who�ve been around for a long time, it�s an amazing irony. I recall when one of my oldest friends first came to New York out of art school at Yale and rented himself a 3500 square foot loft on Canal and Broadway. $325 a month. No bathroom, no kitchen. Twenty foor ceilings. Streets abandoned after five in the afternoon. We thought he was crazy. He bought the place in 1982 for $45,000 and flipped it six months later for $415,000 and moved upstate, never looking back. Of course, if he had, he might have wished he�d held on another ten years and sold for ten times more. Today, of course, everything downtown is desirable to the golden hordes (or, I should say, the hordes with the gold)."

DPC closes out Fashion Week here.

No comments: